Ok fellas, I know this generation is predominately for “Independent women” (which is not a bad thing); however because of this many men are losing their significance and many relationships are losing balance.  Being the man in the relationship is more than paying for the tab, putting it down in the bedroom and looking good in suits (which are all wonderful assets). Having that sense of security knowing that you (being the man that you are)– are comfortable with that position.  That fact gives us the reassurance we need to feel at ease and vulnerable.

Unfortunately a lot of men are afraid of their woman (not in the physical sense of course), but in the sense that most men get extremely uncomfortable anytime their lady is upset. This tendency puts your woman in control and, contrary to how she may behave; she doesn’t really want to be there. What she really wants is to know she can depend on you to be “The Man”…So here are 8 ways you can show her that you ARE the man:

1)      Exhibit self-assurance: Be sure about who you are and where you’re going in life. If you show her you have no confidence in yourself, she will have no confidence in you. Be careful not to take confidence too far; it can easily be taken as arrogant or egotistic and that’s not attractive.

2)      Treat her as your equal: There’s nothing like knowing you have a partner that respects you and your position in life. When a woman says she wants to be your equal that doesn’t mean she wants to be treated like one of the fellas, that just means she wants you to appreciate her intelligence and value her opinion.  She still wants you to be the man at all times.

3)      Be supportive: Always let her know you’re there for her; financially, mentally and physically.  Although she may not always run to your rescue in her time of need; she wants to know that if she needs your help you’ll be there.

4)      Maintain Balance: Be gentle and firm at the same time. Both qualities are very important because it is easy to become too soft whereas on the other hand you can be too comfortable with your firmness and become too assertive. How do you juggle both you ask?  Here are a few examples of how to maintain a good balance and still play your position:

  • Firmness: Get into the habit of suggesting instead of asking. This is a way to show a little assertiveness, and trust if she doesn’t like what you’re saying she will let you know! Having to constantly ask will soon get old and your lady will start to look at that as a weakness.
  • Gentleness:  Pick your battles.  Having boundaries is a necessity but life isn’t always black & white; compromise is a sign of strength. Being able to compromise will help build that respect level in her book.
  • Firmness:  Don’t be afraid to call her out on her bad habits like, lying, negative behavior, drama, excessive lateness, etc. Doing so will display structure. Note: It’s not what you say it’s how you say it, so be sure to address the situation in a respectful way, this way she will know you are serious and that you have her best interest at heart.
  • Gentleness:  You don’t have to react to every little thing she does wrong. Letting your lady act silly and unreasonable once in a while is another sign of strength. Let her feel as if she’s won the battle every now and then; plus that gives you a chance to take charge during make up sex (she is sure to confess you’re the man after that!).

5)      Show leadership: It’s very imperative as the man that you show leadership. People admire those who step forward and handle difficult situations versus those that stand on the sideline and wait for others to solve the problem. It assures your lady that you have a plan; we in turn feel safe knowing you have it all under control.

6)      Being Strong:  Displaying strength doesn’t mean you have to walk around picking up cars and flexing your muscles all day. Personally I think a man that has to prove his strength through physical actions all the time suffers from low self esteem; totally unattractive. However, a man that is strong enough to control his anger and his passions is better than a physically strong man that can conquer a city.

7)      Be Decisive: As a man, you have the privilege of making decisions without all of the emotional cross-talk that goes on inside a woman’s head. That natural characteristic of yours is one of the perks a woman receives when she has a man in her life. So, don’t cheat her out of it! Always have a plan in mind.

8)      Allow her to be a Woman: Let her be herself and be free. Trying to control her every move like who she interacts with and the decisions she makes will only push her away from you. Show her your self-confidence by allowing her to live; believe it or not women brag on having a man that gives her “personal space”.


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