The first few weeks of dating are spent getting to know the new person in your life. The chase is exciting and you get butterflies whenever he texts.
Then comes the “honeymoon” period when you’re officially an item and you couldn’t be happier. You can’t stop beaming and everything just feels right.
It’s also during the honeymoon period when the pair of you get really close and tell each other sweet nothings about how you’ll be together forever and always.
But the honeymoon period has to end sometime. Once it’s over, life can so easily get in the way. Before you know it, he leaves the house for work before you’ve even woken up, and you don’t see him again until the sun has set.
It happens to all of us. Now that we’re all working more hours than ever before, it’s not easy to always feel close to our partner. Things just get in the way. He’s got his job, you’ve got yours, and you’ve both got your separate interests and groups of friends.
If you want to tighten the bond between you both and feel a strong connection with him once again, here are 10 top tips on how to feel closer with your partner.
Put down your phones
You don’t get to spend much time together these days, so when you do, why don’t you both agree to put down your electronics?
Phones get in the way of conversation and intimacy, especially now that smartphones can pretty much do just about anything. Whether we’re quickly checking our Facebook notifications or finding out the basketball scores, our phones take us away from the real person that matters – our partner. Take a break from your electronics and get to know your man again.
Workout together This is another good tip on how to make your relationship better. The new saying has it that couples who sweat together, stay together. We can’t quantity this right now, but it’s a good idea to start a workout regimen together if you want to spend more time with your partner.
Perhaps you both have your own reasons for wanting to exercise. Maybe he wants to get healthier while you want to lose a bit of weight. Whatever your reasons are, make the joint decision to join a gym together – or create your own workout regime at home or out and about.
Wake up together
It’s not easy to wake up at the same time when one of you has to get up early for work and the other can catch an extra hour or two.
But that window of time in the morning is super precious, and when you leave the house without seeing your partner, it means the first time you get to say Hello and give them a kiss is when you both return home from work.
At which point, it’s often already dark.
Wake up together, savour the rising sun, eat breakfast and drink coffee. Kiss, talk, start the day as One!
Read the same book
This is something my partner and I tried – and it worked like a dream.
Watching the same film together is one thing, but it’s not as involving as reading the same book (independently, of course!). When you both read the same novel (or non-fiction), you can read it at the same time and then talk about it afterwards.
You both need to be into reading, otherwise it just doesn’t work. But if you both derive intellectual stimulation from reading and critiquing books, this is one surefire activity that will bring you closer together.
Relive funny memories
Everyone loves to laugh. But if you two haven’t felt all that close lately, you might also not be doing too much laughing.
Short of watching a funny movie, why not relieve hilarious memories the two of you have shared together? Chat about the silly little things he or you did and make yourselves roll on the floor with laughter.
For a long-term relationship to work and survive the obstacles that are thrown at it, letting yourselves go and laughing is essential. So do it.
Have date nights This is one of the most important tips on how to make your relationship better. Making time for one another is really important if your relationship is going to last the distance. Naturally, it’s not always easy to do this every single day of the week. But how about setting aside at least night night each week for date night?
This week you could do something he wants to do, while next week you could both do something you want to do.
Prioritise date nights so that nothing gets in the way.
“It’s your turn to cook tonight!” he screams at you from his video game den. “I cooked last night!!” you shout back, before banging a pan on the table. Instead of arguing about whose turn it is to cook, why don’t you both cook together? Cooking is a great activity that more couples should engage in. Rather than letting your partner getting all hot and flustered by themselves in the kitchen (and especially rather than YOU getting all stressed out as you burn your potatoes again) utilise teamwork and nail your dinner together.
“Tell Me A Story …”
Don’t just ask him how his day went while you casually flick through your magazine without even listening to his same old response. Be creative and draw out an interesting anecdote by asking him to tell you a story. Maybe you could ask him what his fondest childhood memory is, or what his favourite holiday was. Perhaps you could even ask him to recount his most embarrassing moment! Whatever you ask him, give him your undivided attention and be prepared to ask questions. Do the little things
A really easy way to get close to your partner again is to do the little things for him. Maybe you could make him a cup of coffee in bed, snuggle up with him on the sofa while he files some documents. Perhaps you could hop in the bath together or just walk the dog together. It’s the little things that make a difference. Explore the deeper emotions There could be a reason why you haven’t been feeling too close lately, and it may have nothing to do with the fact that you both work long hours. Instead, it might be because you aren’t emotionally connected right now for some reason. Maybe he is always angry, or you seem to be perpetually upset. Perhaps there is anxiety or a lack of empathy in the relationship. Dig deep, uncover any issues and then talk them out