Imagine a man who met a woman and proposed to her. The woman told him she was in a relationship but the man persisted and married her.
It is five years into the marriage and three children but the woman is still seeing her boyfriend and she makes no secrets about it. Many tell-tale signs such as text messages , dates outside town show she does not plan giving up on her boy and the man looks on.
Why men stay in bad relationships
We are greatly influenced by the type of marriage we grow in. If a man grew up in a bad marriage, he sees bad marriage as normal. Such men pick women who provide hostile environments which activate the man’s past memories and as he copes with the challenge, he attempts to heal his past.
Such men prefer women who create problems for them. If a bad woman leaves, he goes for another bad woman in an attempt to heal his past. Some call it repetitive compulsive order.
Some men think they are not lucky with women and may blame evil spirits working against them. They stay in bad relationship and cope.
A man has great emotional fulfilment solving problems because it shows his competency and power. Again, while a woman will easily seek assistance when she has a problem, a man sees this as a sign of weakness and will not get sympathy.
Men are too proud to talk about their relationship problems. There are also those men who stay in bad relationships because their women give them occasional good times such as expensive gifts and good sex.
Today, some women are loaded and will ‘spoil’ a man to cover her bad behaviour and keep him.
There are also those who have joint investments with their women and have to stay in the relationship or leave and lose what they have worked for all their lives.
Some stay in bad relationships but do not commit themselves to it. They are virtually on their own and have all the time to focus on their life ambitions.
The more he succeeds, the greater his self-esteem grows and the more he concentrates on his business. A bad relationship can wait as long as his business booms.
There are also those who stay in bad relationships to enhance their social status. In Ghana, a man is expected to marry and those who are not married are seen as irresponsible and not worth any respect.
Will you stay with a bad woman
If you are in a relationship with a bad woman you know it; she is disrespectful and critical. She is selfish and focuses only on what she gets from you. She is dishonest and lies to cover up lies.
Some are unfaithful, intolerant and abusive. If only you knew how many men are being beaten by their women constantly!
If you are in a bad relationship, put your ego aside and work on it. The good news is that, in most cases, it takes one committed partner to make a relationship work because a partner merely responds to what you do.
If you show love and care, your woman will show love and care. Be a model for your woman by your kind words and actions.
Speak the language of love; show affection and do acts of service, send gifts often no matter how small they may be because they are powerful signs of love and goodwill. Make time for your woman and listen to her.
You may see some of her complains as frivolous but to her, it may be a big deal. If there is anything your woman wants as far as it is possible, do it for her.
Love costs and you must be ready to pay for the sacrifices you make for your woman. If you become everything to your woman, she will be everything to you.
What do you do if after doing your best your woman still proves unlovable? You choose; if you still love her stay, if not leave. Life is about the choices we make.
Email [email protected] 0208181861